2 things to remember ~ small steps are progress and asking for help is a sign of strength
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There are many potential benefits when beginning Personal/Psychological Counselling with Bella
Such as acquiring new skills • improved communication and interpersonal skills • increased confidence and decision-making skills • gain greater self-acceptance and self-esteem • ability to change self-defeating behaviors/habits and reach your goals • better expression and management of emotions, including anger and anxiety • ability to manage stress effectively • relief from depression, anxiety or other mental health conditions • improved problem-solving and conflict resolution abilities Through Counselling you can learn to change your attitude and improve your life!  Are you getting Ready for Marriage?
The Importance of Pre-marital Counselling You’ve set the date. You’ve bought the rings. You’ve bought the dress. You’ve booked the venue and maybe even quarreled over where to put Aunt Rose on the seating chart. The two of you have spent so much time, money, and effort planning your ideal wedding ~ but how much energy are you putting into planning your ideal marriage? For many, the seemingly never-ending list of tasks to accomplish before you get married can distract you from what’s most important: building a secure foundation for the journey you are about to embark on with the one you love most. Your wedding day will come and go. But, if done well, your marriage will last a lifetime. Premarital counselling can be a powerful way for you and your partner to prepare for the life and family you are creating together. What is premarital counselling? Premarital counselling is a specialised type of therapy which helps couples to prepare for marriage. Partaking in premarital counselling before getting married enables couples to begin to build a healthy, strong relationship that can help to provide a solid foundation for their union. Premarital counselling helps couples identify and address potential areas of conflict in their relationship, counselling can also prevent small issues from escalating into serious concerns in the future. Another great characteristic of premarital therapy is that it can also help couples identify their individual expectations for the marriage and address any significant differences they might have. Goals of Premarital Counselling Premarital counselling is provided in order to help couples enhance their relationships prior to marriage. Through counselling, couples are advised to discuss numerous topics, including the following: Communication skills Finances and money management Expectations, beliefs and values Children and parenting Decision making and conflict resolution Intimacy, affection and sexuality Dealing with anger and emotions Roles in marriage Premarital counselling is a great way for couples to enhance their ability to communicate and establish realistic expectations from one another and at the same time is also a great way to develop conflict resolution skills. It’s crucial to remember that each individual brings their own opinions, values or history into a new relationship which do not necessary match with their partners. Quite often people get married thinking that marriage will fulfill their emotional, financial and social needs. Unfortunately, this does not turn out as they would have hoped or expected. Thus, when differences and expectations are discussed before marriage, a couple can develop ways to understand and more importantly, support each other once married. Too often couples get so tangled up spending time and money planning the perfect wedding, they fail to address issues that would serve as a foundation of their marriage later on. Therefore, for newly engaged couples, premarital counselling is a positive, affirming and bonding experience which can only heighten their commitment to get married and essentially to the marriage itself. In times like these, it’s really important to remember to breathe.
Deep, slow breathing reduces stress on our body and relaxes our nervous system. Try inhaling for 8 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, exhaling for 8, hold for 4 again and repeat. It’s important to breathe into our belly instead of upper chest. Let's try an experiment by incorporating this into our day when we are stopped at a red light, cooking, listening to music or before going to bed and see how we feel. I hope you’re all keeping well. I'm missing all my clients and look forward to connecting with you again in person. We are all affected in one way or another by the Pandemic. We may be feeling sadness, dread, fear, despair, helplessness, powerlessness, anger, guilt or guilty for feeling the way we do. Most of us are in an acute state of grief for the world we once knew ~ #thebeforetimes
Disruption and stress is part of our modern lifestyles, but being stressed out does not have to be. Many things in life are beyond our control ~ especially the behavior of other people. Rather than stressing out over others, why not focus on the things you can control such as the way you choose to react to situations. Reacting to difficult and challenging situations by feeling overwhelmed, becoming frazzled, distraught or anxious is not just a mental hazard ~ it is a physical one as well. The more stressed out we are, the more vulnerable we are to viruses, infections and chronic or life-threatening illnesses; leaving us less able to enjoy the beauty and pleasures of life. Music ~ listen to music that makes you feel good and brings joy to you at home at a pleasant volume. Dance ~ Have a fun dance party workout (even if it's just for one). Play ~ play board games or complete a puzzle with your family & housemates, entertain each other, laugh, tell stories and talk about your future plans and goals. Laugh ~ Watch a comedy. Research indicates that laughter is good for the soul. Laughing is found to lower blood pressure, reduce stress hormones, increase muscle flexion, and boost immune function. Laughter also triggers the release of endorphins; the body's natural painkillers. Laughter also produces a general sense of well-being. The ability to laugh (even artificial laughter because our bodies cannot tell the difference) has the power to instantly cheer one up, help one cope with illnesses such as depression and anxiety, and can bring light into the darker areas of our lives. Nap ~ We’ve all heard of “beauty sleep” ~ there is a reason it is called that. When we are sleeping our cells renew and regenerate themselves. Sleep deprivation can not only affect our appearance, it also affects our immune system, making it weaker and leaving us vulnerable to viruses, illnesses and infections. Garden ~ try growing your favorite fruits and vegetables. Getting our hands dirty in the garden can increase our serotonin levels. Contact with soil and a specific soil bacteria, Mycobacterium vaccae, triggers the release of serotonin in our brain according to research.* Serotonin is a happy chemical, a natural anti-depressant and helps strengthens the immune system. Tiptoe Through the Tulips ~ Tending to your garden can help you forget your problems and allows you to commune with nature, a well known stress reliever. If you are not into gardening, tend to a houseplant. Plants = Growth = Cycle of Life. Also plants are a nice reminder that stress and your current situation will change with time. There is also the added benefit of more oxygen in your Home. Move your body ~ go for a walk and enjoy the cherry blossoms, different colored trees and spring flowers that are blooming this magical time of year. Cook ~ try cooking something new ~ we recently made whole grain whole red wheat pizza on the BBQ for the first time and it was delicious! Paint ~ start that painting you've always wanted to do but were too busy to begin. De-clutter your bedroom and home ~ only keep the things that make you feel good. Create ~ start your own business, what does the world need in 2020? Create that! Be Positive ~ Think positive thoughts, a positive mood will help protect your immune system. Recent research on negative thoughts have been shown to depress your immune system and make it weak against viruses. Ignore Negativity ~ Isolate yourself from negative news about the virus, everything we need to know, we already know. Stay Smart ~ Wash your hands and socially distance, be part of the solution not the problem. Phone a Friend ~ Sharing your thoughts can give you perspective, alleviate your burdens and leave you feeling cared for. Express your feelings and what you are going through with a trusted friend or your Counsellor. Doing this can release stress, be cathartic and very therapeutic. Trust and believe you will survive ~ this too shall pass as everything is temporary. It's okay to also feel gratitude, hopeful, and have the courage to stay positive, healthy and safe. *A report in the Mental Health Journal cited gardening as being able to reduce stress and improve mood, with a reduction in symptoms of depression and anxiety. Through Counselling we can improve our mental health and improve our lives
With Counselling we can learn to
Ctrl + Alt + Del Control yourself Alter your thoughts Delete negativity Together we can create the positive change you want in your life
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